While Kathy and I were still in Kansas City, the Lord encountered me in one of the most alarming experiences of my life. First, He guided me through a brief vision of hell, and then brought me up into heaven, where He engaged me face to face.
I had just gone to bed, and was laying on my back, when a large dark circle opened above my feet. It was a round hole, or portal, that I could see with my physical eyes. As I stared up into it I could make out black images moving upon a black background; like a living relief-sculpture.
In the first scene, I saw military tanks. Many military tanks. Almost more than could maneuver in, and around each other. They were facing in all different directions, crashing into each other. I could feel the terror in the vision. Each tank full of fear that it was about to be blasted. I believe there were also people outside and underneath the tanks; fearful that they were about to be crushed by the tanks. The fear of death was intense, and real.
I heard the Spirit say: “This is a picture of hell.” As I was hearing this, I wondered: how would the fear of death be real if you knew you were in hell? Somehow the terror never stops in hell. But you are constantly in fear for your life. Constantly. Like every breath, abject terror – constantly. Forever.
I looked to my left and I could see our bathroom doorway. I looked to my right and I could see our closed window blinds. I shut my eyes tight, and then opened them; looked straight ahead of me; the circle remained open in front of me; clear; black, horrible…
A new scene began. Nuclear bombs exploding on a vast landscape. More terror and horror. I couldn’t see people – only mushroom clouds billowing up and out; and a sense of impending, utter destruction. All was being laid waste.
The next scene was the briefest. It was a sky filled with “aliens” terrorizing the inhabitants below. What was most prevalent wasn’t the aliens, but the terror that they incited. I felt a great great fear about their presence.
I wondered silently: “Isn’t hell supposed to be about personal suffering and horrible, gruesome torture?” I heard the Spirit say: “Even in this vision, I’m sparing you, but since you’ve wondered.” He showed me a person who was drowning another person in a dark pool of cold water; like in the shape of a shallow grave. Hands around the neck; submerging the other into their death. Over and over – I could feel the dying one’s fear & desperation each time. I could feel the consuming rage AND the murderer’s great remorse at the same time. It was a friend he was murdering – again and again.
That was enough. I closed my eyes. The vision disappeared.
When I closed my eyes, it fully occurred to me: I wasn’t sleeping. I had been awake. I had had my eyes open – not closed, the whole time!
I could still feel the unrelenting terror and horror of the scenes. I thought: “This is the reality that so many that I know are headed for…” I don’t want to experience this. I wondered, “Is this what I’m going to experience? Is this why You’re letting me see this, Holy Spirit?”I felt like He would have taken me back there, had I focused on it again – but I didn’t want to. Who would want to?
I could feel the sweep of history all rushing for a giant leap into hell. Unavoidable. Unstoppable. Relentless. I could see individuals who had no idea where they were running to, laughing and cursing – but rushing all the same into this end. A leap into some horrible chamber in the cosmos. Blind. I could feel the zeal to let people know “Hell is for real!” It’s so close. We’re all in such danger! And I thought of unsaved loved ones… Those that would laugh at the idea of hell… I could feel the Spirit’s kindness in showing me only 30 minutes of this place. It all occurred in 30 minutes.
I could also feel the presence of many many demons; they seemed perplexed and vexed at the same time. Either stupid or malevolent, or maniacal. I shuddered at each one. The appearance of each was as repulsive as it was different. Everyone. I didn’t want to see. I wanted them to be gone. I wanted to banish them with a word.
I laid there for another hour? I noticed the radio was on – blaring news & politics. The sound of the voices caused me to feel our world being swallowed by the atmosphere of hell. Fear, anger, remorse, rage, deceit, stupidity, contorted, blindness – like a tide that’s overtaking the whole world; again and again. I laid in bed still amazed that I was awake and not asleep…
I got out of bed to get some juice. When I returned, and laid back down, the vision began again… As the dark images appeared before me, I could see demons of all shapes and sizes; macabre… stupid ones; senseless ones, tortured ones… I said, “Holy Spirit, I don’t want to engage this again.”
He said, “Call on the Name of the Lord.” I began to say “Jesus” softly… In the very instant the first syllable formed on my lips, a large hand extended toward me. It strongly reached down and drew me up into the clouds; billowing grey, dark and stormy. In the distance, I could see a regal figure on a horse. (I couldn’t see the horse. I wasn’t looking at the horse. I was fixed on the Man.) He was riding on the clouds. Riding like a surfer rides on the big waves in the ocean. The clouds expanded and rumbled toward me. He had a fierce, stern, determined look on His face.
I was no longer in my bedroom. I was no longer envisioning hell. I began to wonder about the phrase: “All who call upon the name”, and honestly, I was offended. I could feel my own offense that simply calling on His name was all that it would take to be drawn out of the horror. As I was being offended Jesus rode His horse right past me. Again, I saw no horse, only Him. He didn’t look at me at all.
As He rode by I heard Him say four things:
“I am Jewish.”
“I am coming quickly.”
“You’ve not given yourself to understanding the horrors of hell.”
“Neither do you comprehend My zeal to extend mercy.”
Behind Him came an army of angels and saints without number; all throughout the clouds.
As I think about each of these images, I can see them; feel them all again. Immediately. My inner-man still trembles like jelly… The mercy of the Lord is soooooo tremendous. It perpetually offends the human mind.
The end for so much of humanity is utterly terrible – beyond calculation.
What gives me permission to diminish the Biblical description of the eternal & horrible estate of those without Christ?
“See then that you walk circumspectly, not as fools but as wise; redeeming the time, because the days are evil.” (Ephesians 5:15)
JSB • March, 2021