Over this long, last year of reflection, revelation and reverberation from the collapse of the International House of Prayer in Kansas City, the Lord has faithfully led me, my wife, and our All Nations household through months of intentional confession, weeping, listening, repentance, lament and contrition. It’s been our “in house” Joel Assembly.
While it is important to understand the dynamics of how the organization, and individual leaders sinned against God and others, it is ESSENTIAL that we bring our own selves into His cleansing light, to purge us of our own sins, and the strong, endemic inclination to “jump out of the number”. I share in IHOP’s sins. I share in her abuses. When I can say that, AND understand WHY I’m saying that, I am free to walk in the light, as He is in the light. His light doesn’t shame me. His light is able to be “true life” to me – all of me.
At the same time, if I am not willing to walk in the light and let Him illuminate my sinful ways, I have no business dialoguing about the sins of others within the organization… Jesus condemned this haughty, critical spirit as “the blind leading the blind”. (Matthew 15:14)
With this in mind, here are 10 places where the Lord has specifically humbled me into honest confession, and repentance, so that I can heal, engage the process of renewing my heart and mind, and (where God permits) help others to do the same.
1. I let the hope of elevating “self”, and cultivating relationship with prominent personalities dissuade me from embracing, living, and teaching the the crucified life.
2. On too many occasions, I did not listen to others; and didn’t make space for them to simply and purely share, emote, weep, etc. re: their cognitive dissonance re: IHOP – because it was IHOP.
3. Too often I attached more weight to the narratives of those who had “achieved platform status” than those that didn’t. (That’s called idolatry.)
4. Too often I was more interested in defending a beloved organization than simply, and faithfully championing God’s best for the individual souls being shaped by that organization.
5. Too often I accepted IHOP’s Prophetic History stories because either it was Mike who was telling it, and “Mike wouldn’t fudge the truth”, or I simply wanted the specific story to be true. I didn’t apply the same rigor to these stories that I do to many other notable prophetic words.
6. I lived, cultivated, and taught a casual, latte-sipping, attitude about serving as a “priest” before the supremely holy God of 300 trillion galaxies.
7. I succumbed to the lie that a ministry could routinely injure a few people and families, and still be achieving great good for the purposes of God.
8. I let the IHOP model of prayer crimp my prayer-life; pruning me from equally needed prayers of confession, lament, repentance, and contrition.
9. I let go of my circumspection, and stopped objecting to where I was experiencing the white, nationalist, male, 21c American cultural lens, because it was IHOP.
10. I’m letting the Holy Spirit show me whatever 10 is; and 11, and 12… as He graciously brings light to my own soul.
The only way to move through the trauma, destruction and tribulation that’s engulfed the House of Prayer world is to be wholly honest about the sins within our family. Unless we see these sins in the Father’s light, we will not understand… A • the depth of sin that has been worked against us, and how seriously it has injured us.
B • the various levels of our own complicity and participation in these sins.
C • the nature of the thorough healing and redemptive trust-building we must engage in, individually and collectively.
D • the fathoms of mercy that Jesus makes available to the sinner(s), and all affected by the sin.
E • Neither will we be adequately prepared to enter into the many promises of the coming season, as the Bride prepares herself for the return of our King.
When persons within the “family” refuse to cooperate with the essential work of naming the sins, the rest of the family is left with the extremely painful, and tender task of identifying the sin. This task is fraught with holy danger, but is vital if the family, and her individual, organic members are to recover in Christ. This endeavor is all the more difficult when the heads of the family are the ones refusing to come into the light and set the tone for those they are called to lead.
Yes. The Lord can heal, forgive and restore, but it is immensely more difficult to work for and receive this depth of redemption once the wounds have become infected, the limbs have been severed, and the perpetrators (that’s all of us) are enclosed in their/our towers of self-defense.
PART 1 THE DEADLY SINS of OUR “FATHER”, MIKE BICKLE
1 • Sexual abuse against our vulnerable, young sisters in Christ
2 • Covering, deceit and manipulation re these abusive sins – for decades
3 • Failure to seek out, and submit to family help/accountability re: the nature, and long pattern of these disqualifying sins
4 • Refusal to trust the mercy of God, as his own sons; our brothers came to him in the spirit of Matthew 18 re his hidden sins
5 • Building a campaign of self-defense, counter-attack, and prophetic machination against his own sons, and daughters, for the benefit of keeping his sins hidden
6 • Repeatedly lying and deceiving investigators about the substance of his hidden sins
7 • Remaining in the shadows for months, allowing his own family to suffer utter decimation, for nothing more than protecting that which should have long been crucified in Christ.
PART 2 THE DEADLY SINS of the LEADERS of IHOPKC
8 • Failure to initially respond to allegations with collective call to humility, trembling, repentance and fear of the Lord (Joshua 7)
9 • Cultivating an adversarial posture against victims and those who were speaking on behalf of the victims
10 • Fostering a self-saving, business as usual, public-relations management spirit while resisting the Lord’s wholesale call to the threshing-floor.
11 • Refusal to listen to hundreds of respected sisters and brothers in Christ; allies, compatriots, fathers and mothers in Christ who have been calling for an objective, third-party investigation
12 • Developing a pattern of communicating with other leaders, counselors, pastors and the rest of the House of Prayer family rooted in suspicion, hostility, pride and pretense
13 • Neglect of the spiritual/emotional needs for staff, families, students and interns to have a safe, holy space to grieve, mourn, speak truthfully, and receive intensive spiritual counsel
14 • Dogged resistance to suspend all other activities and blow the trumpet for a Joel 2 assembly
NOTE TO “US” (House of Prayer Leadership at Large, and the Whole House of Prayer Global Family) If we don’t see that the tribulation that has engulfed the House of Prayer is foremost about the Father judging us, and our household, whatever else we have to say, either as accusation, or in defense, is gonna be off-point. Profoundly. Generally speaking, we humans would rather do the easy work of “destroying”, than the hard work of “healing”. For this reason, the last SINS are not only listed, but also accompanied with words of confession, contrition and repentance. It is vital that we allow the Holy Spirit to search and engage our own souls about these matters.
“The judgments of the Lord are true and righteous altogether. More to be desire are they than gold; yes, than much fine gold; sweeter also than honey and the honeycomb.” (Psalm 19:9-10)
PART 3 CONFESSION of THE DEADLY SINS of HOUSE of PRAYER LEADERS and FORMER HOUSE of PRAYER LEADERS in the DIASPORA
15 • We have refused to respond to the Lord’s summons and have not gathered ourselves to the Lord’s threshing floor through this crisis. We have not called for, nor responded to a collective Joel 2 assembly.
“Now, therefore,” says the Lord, “Turn to Me with all your heart, with fasting, with weeping, and with mourning. So rend your heart, and not your garments; return to the Lord your God… Blow the trumpet in Zion, consecrate a fast, call a sacred assembly; gather the people, sanctify the congregation, assemble the elders, gather the children and nursing babes… Let the priests, who minister to the Lord, weep between the porch and the altar; let them say, ‘Spare Your people, O Lord, and do not give Your heritage to reproach, that the nations should rule over them. Why should they say among the peoples, ‘Where is their God?’“ (Joel 2:12-17)
16 • We’ve watched our sisters and brothers in Kansas City suffer gross sin, difficulty, conflict, and great aspersion without coming to them with united support, encouragement and solidarity.
17 • We’ve attempted to “save self”, and have too easily “jumped out of the number”in our living fellowship with our sisters and brothers in Kansas City.
“He poured out His soul unto death, and He was numbered with the transgressors, and He bore the sin of many, and made intercession for the transgressors.” (Isaiah 53:12)
18 • We have compounded our family’s crisis, by too often allowing ourselves to become embittered observers, and social-media critics of our sisters and brothers in Kansas City.
“Therefore, as the Holy Spirit says: ‘Today, if you will hear His voice, do not harden your hearts as in the rebellion, in the day of trial in the wilderness…’ Of how much worse punishment, do you suppose, will he be thought worthy who has trampled the Son of God underfoot, counted the blood of the covenant by which he was sanctified a common thing, and insulted the Spirit of grace?” (Hebrews 3:7-8; Hebrews 10:29)
PART 4 CONFESSION of THE DEADLY SINS of the ENTIRE HOUSE of PRAYER FAMILY
“I pray, Lord God of heaven, O great and awesome God, You who keep Your covenant and mercy with those who love You and observe Your commandments, please let Your ear be attentive and Your eyes open, that You may hear the prayer of Your servant which I pray before You now, day and night, for Your servants, and confess the sins which we have sinned against You. Both my father’s house and I have sinned. We have acted very corruptly against You, and have not kept the commandments, the statutes, nor the ordinances which You commanded.” (Nehemiah 1:5-7)
21 • We have tolerated, and helped to create a communal atmosphere where the prominent were vaunted, and protected, while the nameless were left vulnerable, marginalized and/or scrutinized.
22 • When our leaders have failed to “blow the trumpet” we have not prayed for them, nor pressed the need for such holy response to the judgments of the Lord.
23 • We have majored on responding to each other, seeking consolation and building self-honoring narratives in preference to seeking truth, counsel and consolation from the Lord, Himself.
“Search me, O God, and know my heart; try me, and know my fears; and see if there is any wicked way in me.” (Psalm 139:23-24)
24 • We have allowed our opinions, our criticism, and bitterness to dictate the thoroughfares of our heart, rather than the Word of the Lord, and His cleansing, redeeming judgments.
25 • In our attempt to remain free of guilt and complicity, we too have easily, and often “jumped out of the number”, and become accusers, rather than fellows with sinners. Our hearts remain all too filled with self-exoneration.
“God is light and in Him is no darkness at all. If we say that we have fellowship with Him, and walk in darkness, we lie and do not practice the truth. But if we walk in the light as He is in the light, we have fellowship with one another, and the blood of Jesus Christ His Son cleanses us from all sin. If we say that we have no sin, we deceive ourselves, and the truth is not in us. If we confess our sins, He is faithful and just to forgive us our sins and to cleanse us from all unrighteousness. If we say that we have not sinned, we make Him a liar, and His word is not in us.“ (1 John 1:5-10)
Beloved family, we have deep, long furrows of spiritual work ahead of us, if we are to walk in the light as He is in the light (1 John 1:7). Our many, common and diverse future assignments from the Lord will not freely go forward with Holy Spirit power if we short-change this cleansing, purging, forgiving, redeeming process. This is no hour of human history to allow any sliver of unhealed or unsubmitted darkness to remain in our lives together. As the title of this article notes, to leave these sins partially or completely undealt with spells ultimate death to the fellowship the Lord has cultivated in the House of Prayer over the last 25 years.
“Beloved, now we are children of God; and it has not yet been revealed what we shall be, but we know that when He is revealed, we shall be like Him, for we shall see Him as He is. And everyone who has this hope in Him purifies himself, just as He is pure. Whoever commits sin also commits lawlessness, and sin is lawlessness. And you know that He was manifested to take away our sins, and in Him there is no sin. Whoever abides in Him does not sin. Whoever sins has neither seen Him nor known Him. Little children, let no one deceive you. He who practices righteousness is righteous, just as He is righteous. He who sins is of the devil, for the devil has sinned from the beginning. For this purpose the Son of God was manifested, that He might destroy the works of the devil.” (1 John 3:2-8)
“Who is a God like You, who forgives wickedness and passes over the rebellious acts of the remnant of His possession? He does not retain His anger forever, because He constantly delights in mercy and lovingkindness. He shall again have compassion on us; He will subdue and tread underfoot our wickedness [destroying sin’s power]. Yes, You will cast all our sins Into the depths of the sea. You shall give truth to Jacob and lovingkindness and mercy to Abraham.” (Micah 7:18-20)
For the month of March (2024) All Nations House of Prayer Southwest is dedicating every prayer-set, prayer gathering, and prayer topic to engage the Lord in corporate confession, mourning, repentance and and purification. If you would like more information about visiting us, and participating with us in this work, contact me, Jonathan Boegl, at xaris4u@yahoo.com
There remains a great promise for all who thoroughly bring their house before the Lord in this hour: “The threshing floors shall be full of wheat, and the vats shall overflow with new wine and oil.” (Joel 2:24)
#IHOPKC folk: At the end of the day, if we don’t see that the tribulation that has engulfed the House of Prayer is foremost about the Father judging His household, WHATEVER else we have to say, either as accusation, or in defense, is gonna be OFF POINT. Profoundly.
Generally speaking, us humans would rather do the easy work of “destroying”, than the hard work of “healing”. In a nut-shell, this is the kind of endemic, and warped way of the curse, that Jesus came to save us from.
What if, we paused our cursing and accusing, and defending, and instead, used our many words to cry out to the Father for His tangible power and presence to rest upon us, the House of Prayer and the praying church?
What if we poured out our broken passion and pain, and tears and angst, and our many sins together at His feet?? Are His arms short? Would He not purge us, forgive us, and heal us? Would He not gather us to Himself? Would He not fit us for His purposes in this hour? Perhaps with even increased fidelity to His heart as the contra-Christ spirit intensifies around us?
This is what I am endeavoring to do here. I’m sick from eating from the tree of the knowledge of good and evil. I’m tired of throwing my stones. I’m bruised from my own punches and counter-punches.
Here are 12 PRAYERS of REPENTANCE that I’m using to enjoin the Lord and His healing mercy.
#01 • A PRAYER of THANKSGIVING and SURRENDER to GOD and HIS JUDGMENTS
“The judgments of the Lord are true and righteous altogether. More to be desire are they than gold; yes, than much fine gold; sweeter also than honey and the honeycomb.” (Psalm 19:9-10)
#02 • PRAYER FOR FORGIVENESS FOR OUR REBELLION AND UNBELIEF
“Therefore, as the Holy Spirit says: ‘Today, if you will hear His voice, do not harden your hearts as in the rebellion, in the day of trial in the wilderness…’ Of how much worse punishment, do you suppose, will he be thought worthy who has trampled the Son of God underfoot, counted the blood of the covenant by which he was sanctified a common thing, and insulted the Spirit of grace?” (Hebrews 3:7-8; Hebrews 10:29)
#03 • REPENTANCE AND PLEA FOR DELIVERANCE FROM THE CURSE OF THE SERPENT
“(When) they knew that they were naked; they sewed fig leaves together and made themselves coverings. And they heard the sound of the Lord God walking in the garden in the cool of the day, and Adam and his wife hid themselves from the presence of the Lord God among the trees of the garden. Then the Lord God called to Adam and said to him, “Where are you?” So Adam said, “I heard Your voice in the garden, and I was afraid because I was naked; and I hid myself.” And the Lord said, “Who told you that you were naked? Have you eaten from the tree of which I commanded you that you should not eat?” Then the man said, “The woman whom You gave to be with me, she gave me of the tree, and I ate.” And the Lord God said to the woman, “What is this you have done?” The woman said, “The serpent deceived me, and I ate.”” (Genesis 3:7-13)
#04 • REPENTANCE FOR OUR HYPOCRISY RE: OUR FAITH IN GOD THROUGH CORPORATE PRAYER
“Now, therefore,” says the Lord, “Turn to Me with all your heart, with fasting, with weeping, and with mourning. So rend your heart, and not your garments; return to the Lord your God… Blow the trumpet in Zion, consecrate a fast, call a sacred assembly; gather the people, sanctify the congregation, assemble the elders, gather the children and nursing babes… Let the priests, who minister to the Lord, weep between the porch and the altar; let them say, ‘Spare Your people, O Lord, and do not give Your heritage to reproach, that the nations should rule over them. Why should they say among the peoples, ‘Where is their God?’“ (Joel 2:12-17)
“Not by might nor by power, but by My Spirit,” says the Lord of hosts. (Zechariah 4:6)
#05 • PRAYER of REPENTANCE for OUR DEEP HYPOCRISY and PROFOUND REBELLION AGAINST the LORD and HIS WAY
“Our iniquities overwhelm us; only You can atone for our great rebellion.” (Psalm 65:3)
#06 • PRAYER of REPENTANCE for ASSUMING WE HAD THE HOLY ABILITY TO FIX THE LORD’S HOUSE
“So they carried the ark of God on a new cart from the house of Abinadab, and Uzza and Ahio drove the cart. Then David and all Israel played music before God with all their might, with singing, on harps, on stringed instruments, on tambourines, on cymbals, and with trumpets. And when they came to the THRESHING FLOOR, UZZA put out his hand to hold the ark, for the oxen stumbled. Then the anger of the Lord was aroused against UZZA, and He struck him because he put his hand to the ark… David was afraid of God that day, saying, ‘How can I bring the ark of God to me?'” (1 Chronicles 13:7-10,12)
#07 • PRAYER of REPENTANCE for GIVING OURSELVES to DEVOURING OUR SISTERS and BROTHERS
“If you go on attacking each other and tearing each other to pieces, watch out, or you will be destroyed by each other!” (Galatians 5:15) [CEV]
#08 • PRAYER of REPENTANCE for DISMISSING and MARGINALIZING the CONCERN and PAIN of OUR SISTERS and BROTHERS
“As for me, when they were sick, my clothing was sackcloth; I humbled myself with fasting; and my prayer would return to my own heart. I paced about as though he were my friend or brother; I bowed down heavily, as one who mourns for his mother.” (Psalm 35:13-14)
DAY #09 • PRAYER of SELF-EXAMINATION and REPENTANCE
“Search me, O God, and know my heart; try me, and know my fears; and see if there is any wicked way in me.” (Psalm 139:23-24)
#10 • PRAYER of CORPORATE REFLECTION and REPENTANCE
“I pray, Lord God of heaven, O great and awesome God, You who keep Your covenant and mercy with those who love You and observe Your commandments, please let Your ear be attentive and Your eyes open, that You may hear the prayer of Your servant which I pray before You now, day and night, for the #HouseOfPrayer Your servants, and confess the sins of #IHOPKC which we have sinned against You. Both my father’s house and I have sinned. We have acted very corruptly against You, and have not kept the commandments, the statutes, nor the ordinances which You commanded.” (Nehemiah 1:5-7)
#11 PRAYER OF REPENTANCE for SHUNNING the WAY of the CROSS
“If you do not take up your cross and follow Me, you are not worthy of Me.” (Matthew 10:38)
#12 PRAYER of REPENTANCE for SELFISHLY SEEKING OUR OWN PROTECTION and SELF-JUSTIFICATION while in the MIDST of CRISIS
“All we like sheep have gone astray; We have turned, every one, to his own way; And the Lord has laid on Him the iniquity of us all.” (Isaiah 53:6)
“In those days… everyone did what was right in his own eyes.” (Judges 17:6 and 21:25)
“There is none righteous, no, not one; there is none who understands; there is none who seeks after God…” (Romans 3:11)
“He who knew no sin became sin for us, that we might become the righteousness of God in Him.” (2 Corinthians 5:21)
“For when we were still without strength, in due time Christ died for the ungodly. For scarcely for a righteous man will one die; yet perhaps for a good man someone would even dare to die. But God demonstrates His own love toward us, in that while we were still sinners, Christ died for us.” (Romans 5:6-8)
“He poured out His soul unto death, and He was numbered with the transgressors, and He bore the sin of many, and made intercession for the transgressors.” (Isaiah 53:12)
SPIRIT WORD & CROSS 